Poker is a beautiful and unique game played by a great number of wonderful characters across the globe. Over the years, numerous nicknames for poker hands have developed, some in humour, some out of tragedy, but all as fascinating as the game itself.
The biggest hand before the flop in Holdem Poker is two Aces and subsquently this hand generates the most excitement and colourful names. Common names for two Aces are Pocket Rockets and Bullets (for obvious reasons due to their shape). They are named after several famous entities with initials starting with the letter “A” including Alan Alda, Albert Anastasia, and American Airlines. They are also known as numerous sharp objects such as the Rocky Mountains, Sticks, Teepees and Two Pips. More comical and obscure references include Squirrel (the nuts) and Batteries (Double A). Names for a single Ace include Bull, Bullet, Death Card (spades), Mastercard, One Spot, Puppy Foot (clubs), SEed, Sharp Top, Spike and Tax Card (spades).
Two kings are the second best hand preflop in holdem and are commonly known as Cowboys. Variations on this include Butchers of Baghdad (so named in reference to Saddam Hussein on the infamous Iraqi most wanted playing cards). Combinations of alliterations of KK include Krispy Kreme and King Kong (and by extension Gorillas, Gorillas in the Mist). They are referred to as Ace Magnets because an Ace always comes on the flop. A single King is also known as K-Boy, Monarch, Sergeant, Alexander (clubs), Charlemagne or Charles (hearts), David (spades), Julius Caesar or One eyed king (diamonds).
Queens often cop the short end of nicknames, partly because of the number of times they are beaten by Aces and Kings, but also through reference to homosexuality. Common polite terms include Ladies, Lovely Ladies, Calamity Jane (likely extensive of Cowboys for KK) and Snowshoes (owing to their resemblance to the original shape of snowshoes). More crude nicknames include Four T*ts, Jail-house Rock, Siegfried and Roy and B***hes.
Smaller pairs such as Jacks to Twos all have a few nicknames. Jacks are known as Hooks or Fish-hooks. Less known names include Kid Dyne-o-mite (TV show reference), Brothers, Jay Birds, John Juanda (Poker Player) and finally Colostomy Bag (Jack is slang for toilet). Two Tens are Two Dimes, TNT, Dynamite and Binary (In Binary 1010 is the equivalent of 10). Nines are known as Barbara Feldon (Get Smart- Agent 99), Phil Helmuth, Popeye and Wayne Gretzky (Hockey Player). Eights are snowmen, Piano Keys, Little Oldsmobile, Racetracks, Two Fat Ladies, Lacey, Pretzels, and Wurlitzer. A couple of Sevens are known as axes, mullets, hockey sticks or walking sticks. Two sixes are known as Boots, Cherries, or Kicks (On Route 66). A pair of Fives are Presto, Snakes or Speed Limit, while a pair of Fours are Canadian Presto, Dark Force, Darth Vader, Magnum and Sail boats. A Pair of three is either known as crabs (claw shaped like the number 3) or treys and a pair of Twos is usually Deuces, Ducks, or Quack Quack (shaped like a duck).
Other non pairing hands of notable fame include the infamous Ace and King combination known as Big Slick. Names include backronyms such as Korean Airlines and King Arthur as well as normally acronyms such as Anna Kournikova (also named because it looks good but seldom wins). Another common reference is Kalashnikov (who designed the AK47). An Ace and a Queen is known as Big Chick or Mrs Slick. Other non pairing notable hands include Jack-Four (Flat Tire – what’s a Jack for?), J6 (Rail Road – phonetics of Jacks n Sixes, Jacks n Sixes, Jacks n Sixes – Woo Woo). Ten-Deuce is known as the Doyle Brunson after he successful made two full houses and won two World Series of Poker bracelets.
The complete list of starting hand nicknames is by far more extensive than this article. Additionly there are alot of names not appropriate for everyday reading. If you have an interest in other poker starting hand nicknames I recommended search Wikipedia for an extensive list of common names and some of the stories about how they came about.
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